


Broken Minds

by TheOneWhoEatsCookies



Category: James McAvoy - Fandom, X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies), X-Men (Ultimateverse), X-Men - All Media Types, X-Men: First Class - Fandom
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Arguing, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Baking, Bromance, Card Games, Charles Has Issues, Charles Xavier has a Ph.D in Adorable, Charles You Will Be Drunk, Charles has legs, Chess, Consensual Sex, Cuteness overload, Denial of Feelings, Developing Friendships, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Erik Has Feelings, Erik Lehnsherr is not a Happy Bunny, Erik has Issues, Erik is Jealous, F/M, Feelings, Female Characters, Fireplaces, Fluff and Smut, Honestly Charles What Are You Thinking, Hurt Charles, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Mind Control, Mind Games, Mind Sex, Mutant Powers, Not for Charles, Original Character is a healer, Past Violence, Poor Charles, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rehabilitation, Sexual Tension, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Telepathic Sex, Telepathy, Threats of Violence, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Wheelchairs, chess conversation, getting shot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-04
Updated: 2018-08-12
Packaged: 2019-06-21 20:34:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15565896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheOneWhoEatsCookies/pseuds/TheOneWhoEatsCookies
Summary: The bullet was never meant to hit Charles. When it did, the whole world stopped. She didn't; she was by him in an instant, healing his body as she committed to the hardest task of her lifetime. Her fate was chosen then, as she saved Charles so that he could save her.-------------------Post X-Men: First Class.Original Timeline.





	1. Fading Away

Something wasn't right, she realized, as for the second time she tried to heal the gash on her leg. Her calf was swollen, small fragments of rock and dirt forcing themselves into the wound. Blood was oozing freely from it now, staining the black fabric of her suit. Jagged pieces of skin were hanging limply onto the side of her leg. At least the clothes would apply some pressure to limit the blood supply and hopefully reduce the bleeding.

With a hiss, she sat down, placing herself on a rock behind the submarine. Why on earth was she not able to heal it? Slowly, her chest rose as she took in a breath to steady herself, wincing as she extracted a rock from the tissue. Fuck. She could always manage soft tissue injuries before. Healing her team numerous times during training. What the hell was going on. She didn't even know how she acquired the bruise, the pain coming to her suddenly, after she left the submarine. It must have been the adrenaline.

Unless something was muting her powers.

Truly, she wasn't even aware of how she attained the cut. It must have happened when the submarine was lifted into the air and crashed onto the beach. Yet what had happened later, she wasn't sure. It was as if the events after the crash were covered by a haze, and all she could remember before being snapped out of her daze is stumbling out through a giant hole in the submarine.

The dirty blonde woman shook her head. What was that feeling? Her eyes scanned the surroundings. Flames were consuming two objects near the shore, the fire feasting on the machines. As she soon realized, the submarine behind her was smoldering in flames. The smell burned her nose and she turned her head into her shoulder to catch the liquid falling from her eyes.

She heard footsteps, and suddenly a weight had been taken off her shoulders. It was as if someone had withdrawn their hand from her body. A tremor shook her, her eyes darting wildly around her. She ripped off her gloves and pressed her hands to the area surrounding the wound.Whatever just happened, she knew now was her chance to heal herself. Closing her eyes and drawing in a breath, she cast her mind into another sphere of reality. Slowly, she allowed her powers to surge through her, hoping that it was simply the adrenaline that previously inhibited her.

It was only when the pain left her that she released a breath she didn't realize she was holding and permitted her gaze to fall down to her calf. The numbing sensation that she now knew all to well started to develop within her, rising through her entire body in waves. The gash was no longer oozing and the shredded pieces of skin were loosing their crimson color. Upon realizing that her abilities hadn't left her, she allowed the corners of her mouth to lift into a hesitant smile. She looked down to her leg, fresh skin was there where the gash once was. Sighing in relief, she brought herself up.

It was eerily quiet. The smoldering remains of the submarine casting a cloud of black smoke over the land. How odd it was, that the sky was still perfectly visible from the beach.

The girl was drawn out of her daze when a pair of striking blue eyes materialized in her mind, yet they had no sooner disappeared than they came into view. It was then that she heard voices, two distinct voices to be specific.

Casting a protective aura over herself she emerged from behind the submarine to behold a group of people on the beach. A quick glance allowed her to see her own men standing at its base expressions of disbelief painted on their faces. She looked down to the ground, following their gaze, and to her own astonishment, beheld a corpse laying before them. Her breath caught in her lungs as she realized who this was and momentarily she was struck immobile, her hazel eyes failing to accept the sight before them.

Laying in the sand with a coin-sized hole in his forehead was Shaw. Sebastian Shaw. A few droplets of blood which had made their way down his brows in little streams now pooled at his eyes. She averted her gaze and shakily walked over to her team, her friends barley acknowledging her, only glancing up momentarily.

What now? She wondered, looking up to their enemies, they were emerging slowly, huddled together, evidently in shock. There were four of them together, yet two more people, a man and a woman cane out of the burning aircraft. It was smashed to pieces, laying on its side. Nobody knew what to do.

The answer came from the sky, a figure floated out of the vessel and landed swiftly on his feet. His hands were extended, palms pointing upwards, they were shaking, yet someone who wasn't observant wouldn't have noticed this. On his head was the same helmet that Shaw wore in order to overcome the telepath's power. Then it clicked, she searched the beach for those same blue eyes that appeared in her mind moments ago. Was he -? Could he?

"The real enemy is out there!"  
The floating man looked paranoid, yet determined. He was pointing towards the beach. She realised what his intention was before he said anything else. "The neanderthal is scared my friends. Go ahead Charles, tell me I'm wrong"

Charles, Charles was his name. He lifted his fingers up to his temple, a look of determination on his features. It quickly changed into disbelief as, panting heavily, he withdrew his hand from his temple and nodded.

The woman ran off. They heard her desperate calls, they failed to hear any recognition from the army. Silence settled amongst them, only their breaths could be heard, forgotten in the wind.

The sea exploded then, or so it seemed, as hundreds of missiles began their assault. It was so loud, momentarily, everyone was looking into the sky. Hundreds of missiles were launched in their direction. She closed her eyes, preparing for impact, yet this never came.

Of course, the man's power was magnekinesis. The missiles stilled, and with a turn of his outstretched hand, they began rotating, changing trajectories.

The telepath tried reasoning with the man who currently posessed the power to kill thousands of men with the snap of his fingers:

"Erik, you said yourself, We're the better men. This is the time to prove it."

Erik didn't budge, his attention was fixed solely on the missiles.

His voice grew more desperate then, yet never loosing its authority. "There are THOUSANDS of men on those ships. Good, honest, innocent men. They're just following orders."

Erik, his name is Erik. A tremor seemed to pass trough him, and his eyes narrowed in determination. Whatever Charles just said, it must have struck a pressure point.

"I've been at the mercy of men just following orders. Never again"

Releasing his outstretched hand, he blasted the missiles back into the ships.

"ERIK RELEASE THEM" The telepath screamed, the voice was meant to be authoritative, yet behind it she heard a trace of desperation.

They missiles were still moving, unstoppable in their quest to sink the ships, taking human lives with them. The man's iron gaze propelling them forward. They all looked to the skies, nobody was able to utter a word. Until they heard a scream and grunt, and the sound of bodies falling to the floor. The missiles stopped, released from their lethal quest, and ever so slowly, began dropping into the sea.

The men on the ground were fighting, throwing punches at each other as the missiles began exploding mid air.

The telepath was trying to get the helmet off Erik; unfortunately, his attempt were futile and ended up amounting to numerous punches he received, causing him to fall to the ground after receiving an elbow to the chin. She wanted to run to him then, he did not deserve to be treated like this by his own "friend." Who even was this friend, and why on earth was he beating the shit out of his clearly weakened companion?

His friends were moving to them now, and for some unknown reason, she had the urge to do the same. Erik, now lashing out in fury, easily prevented their approach by flinging them mid air scattering them on the beach. The woman froze.

He was on Charles now, controlling the missiles with one hand. The woman noticed that he was only able to direct the missiles when fully concentrating on them, and not on punching his friend.

Everyone was looking at the sky now, observing the missiles as they danced across it. Or so they thought, as the sound of a single shot rang through the air.

Nobody knew quite where it came from, but soon after, more shots were filling the air. Erik seemed unfazed by the assault directed towards him, as he continued to deflect the shots with little movements of his hand. Someone was going to get hit, it was inevitable.

Time seemed to slow, and for some reason, the woman knew just what was about to happen. Erik, deflecting the last bullet from himself with a flick of his hand, changed its trajectory to hit Charles in the back instead.

A scream of agony filled the air, as Charles fell down, panting heavily into the sand. Something her broke within her, as deep inside her, the hazel eyed girl collapsed with him. She knew what she had to do the moment the gun fired, and nothing was going to stop her from getting to that man.

She dashed froward, barley noticing the group of people who came her way. It was the man's friends who were now blocking him from any chance he had at living. The group was obstructing her, coming from all directions at once. She was livid, seething on the inside, steaming from the outside as emotions she couldn't quite explain filled her mind.

"LET ME THROUGH, I'M A HEALER I CAN HELP!" She screamed, fighting back tears. Why on earth was she crying?

"Please, let me help! He's not going to make it." Her screams turned to wails as she felt the precious time escaping trough her hands. She had to make him cooperate or else her wouldn't make it in one piece.

"Charles, do that thing you did before. You KNOW what I am!"

"Let her through" he hissed, the action evidently requiring effort and causing him pain.

Reluctantly, his friends parted, yet she wasted no time in pushing and elbowing her way through them. Their heads were turning towards her now, looks of determination changing into astonishment, yet she gave this no mind, her sole purpose was to get to that man. It was as if every cell in her body was destined to save him. It took her seconds to get there, although in her mind, time seemed to form an invisible barrier, making her steps to the wounded man agonizingly slow.

"Move" she spat towards the man in the iron helmet. The harshness of her voice surprising even herself. She was not usually like this. She moved into Erik's place, an expression of disbelief graced his features, and rested her hands on the back of Charle's spine.

"And take that helmet off" she added, even though she didn't really know why, yet something told her that it was the culprit responsible for their current situation.

The man was in shock, yet the others understood what she meant.

"Take it off, you heard her" a voice from behind her spoke, yet she paid it no attention, focusing her mind and taking a deep breath in before repositioning her palms on the mans lower back.

She felt it then, the magnitude of her situation as she realized that the man could not in-fact, move his legs. She swallowed. Hard. She focused again, directing her attention to the bullet that lay on the sand next to them. She had never healed a damaged spine before, her powers being limited to ameliorating soft tissue injuries healing and small cracks in the bone; a spine, this was testing her limits.

The man below her took in a breath of air, he must have been reading her mind. However before she could stop herself, a thought overcame her, flooding her senses as she realized its true meaning; she was going to die here if it meant that he got to truly live. There was no way she could heal his injury without her powers taking over her body. It simply required too much energy and there was only so much she could do. The man's eyes met hers then, and she knew that he had heard those thoughts too.

"You don't have to do this. I'm sorry" he choked out, his voice coming out hoarse and broken.

Tears welled up inside her eyes, threatening to fall as they danced around her face. She was going to do this no matter what, there wasn't another option.

"But you don't understand, I do."

The others watched, as the woman averted her gaze, looked up towards them and her eyes turned hazy. They stared in awe as they witnessed her glow a faint blue, body emitting something which could be compared to a low hum, yet none of them could exactly place it.

She heard it then, the familiar sound of of soft tissue healing, and she looked down at the man before her. His lips were pressed together tightly, their pink flesh turning white. His eyes were shut, little wrinkles forming around their outer edges. It was true, she knew, the experience of begging healed was never a pleasant one. After all, you did feel all the fibers in your body reattaching themselves.

Her own face was fixed in pure concentration, beads of sweat forming on her forehead as her hands began to shake. The faint blue glow she had emitted soon faltered, turning into an orange hue around the pair. A flake of something hit her cheek then, it was light and fragile, resembling a burnt piece of paper that floated in the wind. She thought nothing of it then, directing all her attention toward the suffering man, who had opened her eyes and was now staring at her legs in bewilderment.

She felt it then, the familiar sensation of someone invading her mind. She didn't resist, as she knew how much effort this took him in his current state. His voice was calm, what he was saying was a matter of fact.

" _Your legs are falling apart, they're disintegrating into dust_ "

The pain took her by surprise, yet once it started, she was being torn apart. Inch by inch, she saw her body fall to pieces, agony filling her mind. She howled, as her body writhed against her will. She was so close, she could feel it, yet she was not going to make it in time. She couldn't focus on relenting her own torment, all her energy had to be aimed at him. Her blonde braid had come undone as she forced her head to turn, the veins and tendons visible in her neck as she looked at the man again.

She hadn't noticed, but his fingers were on his temple, his eyes searching for yours.

" _You have to stop, you will die_ "

She shook her head, she was going to finish this. Do one good thing in her life.

" _I can feel your pain, you won't make it. Stop_ "

Oh she felt the pain; daggers were stabbed into her abdomen, tearing her flesh and turning it into dust. They carved their way up to her chest, dancing on her ribs and lungs as she took her final breath.

She saw muscle now, in the place that she once saw his spine. The man relaxed visibly, his pupils dilating at the the sudden loss of pain. She was so close.

She looked down, the embers were consuming her neck now.

Yes, she thought, spare my arms so that I can do one thing useful with my life and save this pure man.

He was better than her, she thought as her mind was torn away, he was fighting to save humanity, something she had been taught so desperately to loathe. A race that she had aimed, for her entire life to exterminate, yet this man had it in his heart to save them. Her life meant nothing, she realized as she succumbed to the torment of the knives that now took her fingers, and with a final look at this him, her soul was ripped to pieces.

To the observers, it looked simply as if her body, finding serenity, faded away into dust, and was now dancing with the wind.

She drifted then, in timeless agony, unable to release her screams as she started to loose focus in order to mute the knives carving her up from the inside. She was so close to death. She yearned for nothing more in that moment than to succumb to its warm embrace. She leaned in, feeling its's gentle touch enclosing upon her, and sighed in peaceful bliss. The pain had dulled, she was-

" _Alice_ " the sound seemed to come from everywhere, yet from nowhere at once.

" _Alice_ " it was sharper now, breaking her away from her final savior.

" _I cannot let you do this_ " then she felt it, it was as if she was being dragged on the floor, her body raw, skin gone.

No. She was so close to peace. She couldn't go through this again, she thought as her body was being pulled back by the telepath.

" _Let me go, please_ " she begged in her mind, " _I can't make it again_ "

Yet the man would not listen, even though she was sure he heard her. It was the worst pain of her life. She felt his mind surround her own, and then she wished she died.

A cacophony of noises reached her ears. Screaming. She was wailing as she felt her body burst into flames once more. First her head. Then the fire moved downward with agonizing slowness. She wanted him to die, she wished she never saved him.

He was hissing now too, incomprehensible words leaving his mind, tears welling up in his eyes.

Whatever she felt, he felt it too.

Everything happened in an instant, the telepath screamed and momentarily, the haze lifted, taking with it the pain.

She felt it briefly; the numbness. The sand, caressing her skin. The wind, soothing her senses. She recalled producing her aura with the last bits of sanity before she fell into darkness.


	2. Disbelief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An outside perspective of the events at the beach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys,
> 
> I’ve just recently watched X-Men first class and I can’t bear to see Charles on a wheelchair. So I decided to change the events a little...

The others were to stunned to speak. Too shocked to move. However they would have had to be heartless to feel nothing about the situation displayed before them. 

The couple was on the floor, both in evident pain as the mystery woman concentrated on Charles. Raven had a feeling that woman had something in her, something good, yet she couldn't place it yet. 

What she did know was that the woman was insane. This she realized when the blonde began to glow red. Everyone was speechless, they didn't even bother attacking themselves, maybe they were too tired, yet there was something mesmerizing about the scene playing out before them.

So many words seemed to pass in between the crippled pair on the floor, yet the only ones they uttered seem to carry more meaning than any of them could understand. 

Why Charles let her through, she did not know, yet Raven was finding it hard to trust her even though she was evidently healing their friend. 

She was distracted from her thoughts when she noticed a faint movement out of the corner of her eyes, the girl, she didn't catch her name, was shaking.

This she could explain, intense effort during the use of their powers often caused this to happen, yet she had never known what could happen next.

As if turning into burnt paper, pieces of the woman began to tear away. She seemed not to mind this until Charles put a finger to his temple and her eyes went wide, momentarily darting to her feet before releasing the most pain filled cry Mystique ever heard. The hazel eyed girl was shaking now, tears and sweat on her face, hair loose and falling around her. 

Charles looked peaceful,he was able to take in a breath. She knew that whatever the unknown woman was doing, it was successful. Her only worry was that she would not complete her task. She was floating away now, and the woman must have realized because she took her final breath and she was swept away by a gust of wind that came their way. Mystique released a small shout at this, catching the others on the beach by surprise.

Why did she care? She didn't know this woman. 

Charles was grabbing at the air now, trying to catch the pieces of the woman's body. Yes, she was a woman now, Mystique realized, what she just did made her one in the most brutal way possible. 

Charles' fingers were on his temple again, and he was screaming her name. How desperate his cries were, broken. She didn't think she ever saw him in such intense pain, and she had just witnessed him get shot.

The flakes seemed to twirl, dancing in the wind and floating to where the woman once was. 

She looked around, momentarily, everyone was falling to their knees, hands desperately covering their ears as they sank to the ground. Before she had time to question their behavior, it hit her too and her ear drums felt like they were about to shatter. The screech was unbearable, and as it drew on, she wished nothing but for it to end, she couldn't breathe, she couldn't think, all she could do was listen to that dreadful sound. 

Then it was over, and her muscles relaxed as her hands dropped to her sides. It was as if all her muscles were weak. She was in her natural blue form, and she wondered when the shift took place. 

The woman was on the sand now, eyes closed, hair splayed everywhere, curled in the fetal position. Mystique could mistake her for being asleep if she didn't start shaking, the blue aura that immediately formed around her was breaking. Mystique had the inexplicable urge to run to her, and when she aimed to cross the aura, it was as if her entire body had just ran into a wall. She stumbled backwards, eyes wide.

"Someone has to help her," her voice came out shaking, resembling a croak. She couldn't explain her feelings towards this woman, yet she knew that they couldn't let her die. "Do something!" she screamed at no-one in particular.

"You saw what that thing did to you, that line must be some sort of field." This was Hank now, speaking in a level tone, seemingly unaffected by their predicament. "We can't get to her until she wants us to, its a protective barrier. I'm unable to provide an idea as to how to bypass it since my knowledge on her mutation is limited. The safest way would be to leave her alone until her body realizes it is not under imminent threat and the field weakens" Hank was speaking quickly, the others barley keeping up which him as he slipped into his own world of scientific realization. 

Charles was having none of it. 

He approached the field slowly, with cautious steps, partially due to the fact that he was still unsure about the strength in his legs; yet partially because he truly didn't know what would happen to him when he tried to cross the wavering blue field floating in the air.

He was standing at the rim of the aura now, and Mystique was sure that if he wanted to, he could have touched it. He hadn't spoken since the girl collapsed on the floor. Maybe he was experiencing overwhelming shock, yet something told Raven that Charles wouldn't be that affected by pure adrenaline. She knew him since his childhood, and Charles was never one to be speechless or loose his composure. She had never seen him like this before.

As she studied him, she noticed that his hair was disheveled, his usual messy strands now covering his face. His eyes were unfocused, his pale skin covered with beads of sweat mixed with dirt. Grime settled in his wrinkles, there was a trace of blood on his chin. How he acquired this, she didn't know, but in this state, he looked years older. As if he had aged a decade in those few moments. 

She couldn't help but think that he looked so weak, so fragile, as if the slightest gust of wind would knock him over.

Gradually, he knelt down before the shimmering blue line, she knew that he was unsure about his next actions, yet slowly he moved his arm forward. The field shifted then, emitting a low hum, as if a swarm of bumble bees had just surrounded them. He froze his movement, his fingertips were brushing against the blue hue. He waited, looking up for the first time in what felt like an eternity and his eyes found hers immediately. 

" _Do I do this?_ " His eyes were questioning, he needed her support.

All she could do was offer a nod. 

He moved his hand forward, the bees began their dance. Their gentle hum growing to a distinct rumble. Mystique flinched, expecting him to be knocked away like her, however, to her astonishment, the field surrounded Charles in an instant. He was barley moving, evidently surprised. 

She was truly bewildered. What the fuck had just happened? She got hit with a force strong enough to knock her back a couple of meters, whereas Charles has been enveloped by the blue hue in an instant. 

What even was that hue? Better yet, how was she producing it and how on earth was it so strong even when the woman was unconscious? Her mind was teeming with questions and possible explanations, she needed to know more. 

Mystique saw Charles approach the woman. He was treading slowly, as if on thin ice. Truth be told, he was on thin ice. She observed his shaking hands as he bent down to kneel beside her. When he put his arms under her and got off one knee to stand up, she allowed her muscles to relax and her hands to fall from her mouth. 

She could see that the woman was dead weight, there was something about an unconscious body that made it so much much harder to carry. Her arms hung limply by her sides, her neck craned at an awkward angle, hair splayed over Charles' steadily rising chest. 

Charles was walking over to them, his eyes looking for answers. 

The shape shifter wished that he knew what just happened, because coincidentally, she demanded answes too.

"Who is she? What on earth just happened? What the fuck Charles? What will you do with-?" The questions were flying out of her mouth, yet they were only the tip or the iceberg waiting to spill. 

"Not now Raven, and honestly, I have no idea," he was using the voice that she despised, the voice that made him seem so much older than she was, "Can we talk about this later and just go back home?"

He was tired, not in the mood for this. It simply took too much effort.

"What you're taking her with us? You just told me you don't know anything abou-" She was cut short again by the glare he gave her. She knew he was too tired for it yet she couldn't help but feel agitated at the thought that he was taking some stranger into the mansion. It was their safe place, their haven, and letting this woman who they knew nothing about into their home did not seem like a good idea. 

For God's sake, she was with the enemy. She was THE ENEMY. Why was Charles ready to take her into their secret hideaway? She could not force her mind to come to rest. They were walking towards Moria now, they had to get off the beach somehow. The enemies, having teleported away using that devil looking dude, were of no concern to them now. The humans, she thought. 

She glanced to the sea, smiling. They were too bewildered and terrified to cause a threat. 

It was just them on the beach as Moira made the emergency call and they waited in painful silence for the CIA.


	3. Back to Reality

He awoke in darkness. It was his solace, his savior from the constant turmoil in his head. The voices where indistinguishable, one shouting over the other, none of them making sense. His brain was endlessly overstimulated, bursting with inconsequential scraps of other people's lives. It was only when he alienated himself from his friends and surrounded himself in darkness that his mind could rest. 

It wasn't truly surprising that nobody noticed that his disappearances into darkness started happening more often. It didn't come as a shock to them when they didn't see Charles for days on at a time. They were used to his irregular sleeping pattern. They knew never to disturb him in his chambers. The lesson was learnt the harsh way, more specifically, by Erik. None of them knew what had happened when he burst out of Charles' room talking only about about his love for metal for the next few hours. It was only when Charles emerged from his study, groggy and unapproachable, that Erik, petrified, scurried away to his room. When the temporarily metal-obsessed man disappeared, the teens burst into laughter. Charles was struck dumbfounded. Why where they laughing?

——  
"Wait, you didn't make him behave like that?" Raven asked through giggles.

"He was talking about metal as if it was the love of his life for hours!" Alex added, drinking a glass of water while leaning on the kitchen wall for support.

"We couldn't get him to shut up! He was quoting Romeo and Juliet at some point. You're telling me that wasn't you?" Hank was dying of laughter, in fact, Charles couldn't recall the man laughing this loud. Ever. 

"I, uh. What?" Charles shook his head, blinking a few times. "What happened?"

"Well we forced him to check on you at two, and then he didn't come back for a while. We were starting to get worried. Then all of a sudden he burst through the kitchen doors, ran to grab that chair," she pointed at the silver chair Charles was leaning on, "and began kissing it as if his life depended on it." Raven was explaining.

They all laughed again as Charles looked at the chair in disgust and gently shuffled away. He recalled Erik knocking on his door. Charles kindly asked him to leave, being preoccupied in the documents Moira gave him. When Eric kept persisting Charles guessed he got mad, he was exhausted, and when he was tired he found it difficult to control both his emotions and his powers, so maybe, just maybe...

"Oh God." He gave out a long laugh, his grouchiness long forgotten. His students were staring at him, eyes lost. They had no clue what was going on.

"I guess I he must have really gotten on my nerves when he kept persisting at my door," he continued, "and I don't think clearly when I'm annoyed so I just made him direct his attention to his beloved metal. Maybe too much attention." 

The students were picturing this scenario in their minds. Raven let out a snort. Alex was quietly giggling as Charles excused himself in order to search for Erik. 

They knew since then to never disturb Charles when he was in his rooms, all fearful of the consequences awaiting them.

———

He brought his mind back from the memory. It was truly bewildering what his mind was doing when he wasn't aware of it. He willed himself to get out of bed and made his way to the window, opening the curtains. What he expected was blinding sunlight, this unpleasant surprise always welcomed him in the morning, so he squinted his eyes in preparation. No sunlight came his way, in some sense, he was disappointed. Instead, he was welcomed by the starts. He heard crickets, it must have been really late. How long was he asleep? 

He left the comfort of his chambers after putting on his nightgown, making his way to the kitchen. He was famished. As he entered the kitchen, he heard what sounded like a heated debate in hushed voices. He stilled his movement, taking advantage of the fact that they hadn't noticed his presence yet.

"Its insane! He just brought her here without a word! You heard him, he doesn't even know her. He's risking not only our safety but also allowing for the discovery of the mansion!" Raven was furious, to his puzzlement, the others did not seem so distraught. It would make sense for them to feel betrayed, yet the other mutants almost supported him. 

Hank was speaking now, he never failed to calm her.

"Charles would never do anything to harm us, he must have read her mind during the fight. He must know her, or at least whether she is harmful to us or not. I'm sure that as inexplicable as the situation seems, there must be a logical reason for all this." 

He moved to her side then, arm gently resting on her back. Charles blinked a few times fast in disbelief, yet his jaw dropped only when Raven leaned into Hank. He wasn't sure if this happened due to the intense emotional reaction she had or the two generally shared something. Either way, he was shocked. 

Raven was speaking again;

"Its just that he made us a home here, a safe place for us to live. Where we are respected and treated as we deserve to be; I don't want this all to go to ruin. Definitely not because SHE is here. What even is her name? SEE? we don't even know that about her!" 

Charles felt this was the right time to intervene, or else Raven would pass on her distrust to the other mutants.

"Alice, her name is Alice." 

A painfully awkward silence filled the room. Everyone’s eyes were on Charles, not in a good way.

Raven snorted;

"Great," she rolled her eyes dramatically, "I completely trust her now that I know her name is Alice?" She turned her attention to Alex now. "You'd think he'd know more about her seeing that he's a telepath, no?"

Alex just shrugged, he was never one for drama.

Charles sighed, this was going to be a long conversation. 

"Her name is Alice, she is a healer, her powers are still developing-" he looked down at his legs, only thinking to appreciate them now. 

The pause allowed everyone to consider this. He would not be standing there now if it wasn't for Alice. They had to admit that.

"I must say, if her intention is to harm us, I don't believe she is doing a good job of it, taking for an example the state of my legs. I assure you that I had experienced, for a moment there, the sensation of complete numbness in them. If not for her, they would be paralyzed and I would be in a wheelchair, so if we are to keep her here, we will do so purely to thank her." His voice was stern and determined, almost as if he was telling them off. Truly, in some ways he was.

"That is reason number one she stays and is worthy of your trust. Secondly, we are currently saving her life. If she was left on that beach, Shaw's men would have killed her for betrayal, since paralyzing me definitely would help them" His anger was getting out of control now, voice increasing in volume. He said the last part looking at Eric who kept avoiding his gaze.

He didn't mean to bring the topic up, seeing as they hadn't talked about it since, however it had to be mentioned.

Raven looked up at him.

"Okay, I must admit she did save you, but I'm still not convinced, can't you read her mind to discover her true intentions?" This seemed like a perfectly logical thing to her, and her question was out of curiosity.

"No Raven, she is out cold and I would find it... Against my morals to look into her mind without her consent." He thought about his words, so that they came out in the most neutral way possible.

Raven was persistent though, as always.

"Well you clearly had no problem doing it on the beach. You had a whole bloody conversation with her at some point, not to mention that half the time when things settled, you were in her mind!"

"I must admit to having used her as a guidance as to Shaw's situation, her mind was most easily accessible. In this state however, we are no longer on the battlefield and she is unconscious, therefore, as she is not aware of my invasion and as it is not directly necessary, I will do the right thing and leave her privacy alone." He wanted to get the situation under control without anger, so his words were factual and unbiased. This was the only way to avoid dispute. 

He felt that Raven was calming down, her shoulders relaxed and eyes looking at him quizzically. He didn't know whether the relaxation was due to his responses or the fact that Hank was rubbing circles on her back with his hand. So far, she seemed oblivious to it. What on earth had he missed, how long was he out for?

"Well you don't find it "immoral,"" she gestured, putting quotation marks in the air, "to look into our minds when we aren't aware of it?"

She was visibly playing with him now, the question not causing harm, yet simply meant to challenge him. This was the Raven he knew, switching moods in a heartbeat. He could manage this, the crisis had been averted. He could go check on Alice now.

"I would say the circumstances are different," he chuckled "you know my abilities and you know that I wouldn't read further into your mind than you are comfortable of. I do try to control my abilities, its only when I'm tired, annoyed" he threw a sidewards glance at Eric and gave a small smile, "in pain or feeling intense emotions that my mind tends to wonder. I do try to control it, trust me." 

Eric was looking at him now too, a smile on his lips. He spoke to them for the first time since Charles walked in.

"Okay, here's my opinion on the subject. Charles is right in not reading her until she awakes. He also is a dick in terms of using his powers, ehem, but that's just the way he is. For now I suggest that we all take a rest and calm our emotions because what it looks like to me is that the girl is staying. We should deal with the issue once we rest; when we aren't overcome by emotions that is." 

Charles had to smile at that, he managed to not only keep the situation under control but also get the mutants on his side.

When the room cooled from the argument, everyone began to yawn. Charles had other plans though.

"If you'll excuse me," he stated, pointing with his head to the direction of the room that the woman was sleeping in. "I should probably check on her."

They didn't say a word but nod, their exhaustion catching up with them. 

Before he could leave, Raven came up to him and hugged him, stating quietly;

"I still don't trust her, but I won't be trying to kill her with every fibre of my body until you find out more." 

With that, she was off.

He couldn't expect more from her, so with another nod, he ran off to the guest room. 

What he didn't see during his mad dash was that all the heads in the kitchen were turned towards him, shaking as they laughed at his actions.

———————————————————————————————————————————

He slowed himself to a walk when he neared her room so as not to wake her. Opening the door cautiously he slipped inside.

She was laying peacefully on the king sized bed, wearing her clothes from the day before. His first thought was that she had to be given fresh clothes, so despite just having that argument about reading minds he searched for Raven.

" _Do you happen to have some spare pajamas that you don't wear anymore? I think you two may be the same size._ ”

He asked cautiously. 

" _Fuck you, Charles._ ” Then a pause.  
" _I'll bring a set down, anything else her majesty needs?_ “

" _Now that you say it maybe a toothbrush, some toothpaste and a towel would be nice too._ " 

He tried to say his words as kindly as possible, taking a seat on one of the mahogany chairs in her room. 

She was about to knock when Charles got up from his chair and was at the door in an instant. God forbid she knocked on that door. 

He gave her his most dazzling smile and kissed her forehead, taking the pile she had in her hands. 

"Ill try to wake her up, could you, you know, uhh help her get changed. Seeing you're a girl and all and it would probably make her more comfortable than-" he stuttered at his words. His cheeks turned a gentle pink and he looked down at the floor.

"Gosh you're so shy sometimes. Yes I'll help her change so that your innocent eyes don't fall upon the body of a woman. She's not bad looking if I'm to be honest. You're missing out," she joked, looking over his shoulder into the room. 

This earned her a punch on the arm. She loved teasing Charles on topics he wasn't comfortable about. How it scared him that his little sister, not biological though he treated her as such, even though he wasn't that much older, freely talked about sex.

"Close the door and wait, we wouldn't want you to see a woman's body!"

They tried to speak in hushed voices, failing miserably as they were whisper screaming.

Charles put his hand in the closing door.

"Wait, maybe I should wake her. Seeing as I'm the one she probably recalls." he suggested shyly. They both didn't really know what to do.

Raven gestured to the bed, smirking; "All yours"

He gave her a disapproving stare yet proceeded to make his way over to the side of the bed.

She was draped in royal blue satin sheets, surrounded by soft white pillows that her head sunk into. Truthfully, she didn't look like she belonged there, matted hair, blood stains on her face and neck, dried dirt on her cheeks and a dirty black suit, resembling their own yellow ones. 

Nevertheless, there was something about her even now, in this state, that Charles found himself lost in. The gentle curve to her lips, their slightly pink color, the slow rise and fall of her chest. Her lean yet athletic build, the woman could carry herself well. He caught himself wondering about her life, what she did, who she was, what led her to meet Sh-.

"Hey, Romeo, we're getting distracted here" She elbowed him in the ribs delicately.

He regained his attention and gently placed his hand on her shoulder. She didn't budge. He shook her slightly. Still no reaction. He looked up at Raven. What now?

"Alice," she spoke, gently yet loud enough to hear.

"Alice, its me Charles," he spoke more firmly, shaking her more vigorously this time.

There was a low hum and suddenly they were pushed back and the woman was sitting up. There it was again, that blue field, although distinctly weaker than last time.

"Where am I?" Her voice was coarse, she cleared her throat and asked again.

"Where am I? What happened, who are you?" she was talking slowly, taking her time to collect her mind and allow it to recall yesterday's events.

She remembered the beach, and Shaw's dead body and the missiles. Then she recalled the shot and her body tensed.

"Its okay, you're safe now." That voice, she knew that voice, it was gentle and soothing. It was the voice she heard in her mind.

More memories flooded her, she began shaking. It was the pain filling her again, crawling towards her through her memories, it was unbearable.

"Alice, you have to put your shield down, or else we can't get to you, we can't help you." It was that voice again, speaking to her through her memories.

There was that sensation again, why couldn't she resist when he entered her mind?

Then she felt calm, the tremors stopped and she withdrew her shield. She was hit with overwhelming sadness, and tears welled into her eyes.

"My name is Charles Xavier. Its me you felt in your mind moments ago, and it was me on the beach. I need to thank you for saving me, but you have to calm your mind. Let us approach you. We won't harm you. Raven here has some clothes for you." he was talking to her as if she was a child, taking small steps towards her the entire time.

She was safe. They wouldn't harm her. The woman was holding grey pajamas with unicorns on them. She didn't say a word. The man was talking to her again.

"I'm sorry I had to enter your mind, you were really distressed. I only wanted to calm you so that we could help you." He was by the bed now, kneeling before her. Whatever he did to calm her, it worked, because the field wasn't acting anymore.

"Alice" she spoke, looking at the blonde woman. "My name is Alice."

"I'm Raven," she held her hand outstretched. "Would you mind if I helped you get changed?" She adopted the same tone that Charles had, the woman was in evident shock. After all she went through, who wouldn't be; although Raven doubted that she truly remembered what happened, she didn't think the woman remembered the pain.

"Its okay I can change myself, thank you though." The woman was regaining her composure, her voice growing more sure, and eyes sharper. 

She began to ease off the bed, and the pair moved away to give her some space. Her movements were slow, indecisive, it was as if she was finding out how much strength she had. Charles' face was riddled with concern through the entire time, no matter how desperately he tried to hide it.

When the woman stood up, she swayed on her feet a little before taking a cautious step. Both of them were at her side in an instant.

"Its really not necessary." she mumbled, eyes finding Charles who offered her an encouraging smile and taking a step away from her.

"All in your own time," he comforted.

However when the girl took her next step her legs gave out, and she was caught just in time by Charles' supporting arms.

"I got you, its okay. You're okay. I got you." She didn't hear these words though, as the tears flooded her once more and she felt her whole body weaken as he lifted her and gently placed her back on the bed. Her hands were around his neck, and when she didn't let go once he placed her on the bed, he couldn't do anything but hug her back.

He realized she needed comfort and warmth when instantaneously, she felt her breath grow more rhythmic and her sobs cease. He was drawing circles on her back with his fingers in order to soothe her, barely moving otherwise so as not so wake her.

Raven was standing at the edge of the bed, her expression unreadable. She felt horrible now, for mistrusting this woman. She was so fragile, and as Charles held her in his embrace, she felt that if he let her go, she may have just fallen apart. 

She had to get Charles's attention so she whispered at him in her head.

" _What now?_ "

" _I need her to fall into a deeper sleep so that I can move away._ "

They waited in silence until after a few minutes, Charles carefully moved her left arm to the side and slipped away from her embrace. She didn't stir. 

They left her clothes on the chair beside her bed and left the room quietly, paying attention to close the door quietly. Once they were out of hearing distance, Raven spoke;

"Well that was something."


	4. Betrayal

He was sitting in the living room, drinking his coffee from his favorite cup. He liked it black, no milk, just sugar. The cup had a picture of Einstein on it, covered in mathematical symbols,it was his ritual, a morning tradition.  
He took another sip, letting his mind clear. He was always the most peaceful when everyone else was asleep, their thoughts not as prominent as during the daytime. He basked in the morning sunlight, standing up and walking out onto the patio. There was a cool breeze, typical of this time of morning. He closed his eyes, letting the sun’s rays fall on his features. The touch was gentle, yet he felt every ray on his skin. His moment of bliss was interrupted when a distinct voice emerged from the dull buzz inside his head.

“ _Pancakes._ ”

That simple thought seemed so strong that it made him laugh. It was the oddest thing to pick up on. 

“ _Let them have pancakes, and hopefully berries too._ ”

He knew what happened immediately when his mind processed the information and recognized the voice. Only Raven enjoyed pancakes in the morning, and she would have them with chocolate syrup, not berries. Besides, Raven’s concept of “morning” began after ten o’clock, and seeing as it was eight thirty, her conscious presence was unlikely.

He was walking towards her room, when he heard her again.

“ _I should find the kitchen easily. No?_ ” 

He dint mean to listen to her, it was just that there wasn’t anyone else to listen to and her thoughts were always really loud. He was surprised to hear her voice calm, taking into account what had happened the past few days. It was odd, her voice was so carefree, she sounded happy almost. As if she had genuinley woken up from a peacefull sleep and was now ready to appreoach the day.

“ _Gosh this place is lovely, the floors are- _“__

__He was close enough to hear the thump of a body hitting the floor and he burst in through the door. She was clinging to the chair where her new clothing lay, face in utter shock. She had no idea what had just happen, grabbing the chair in an instinct. Her blue aura was separating her from the ground. She seemed to be floating above the ground._ _

__“Hi, uhm could you help me? I’ve fallen, as you can see. I can’t really seem to walk. I don’t know why, everything was fine yesterday.”_ _

__He was by her in an instant, lifting her by her sides and placing her on one of the mahogany chairs. Only when he placed her down did her comprehend what she said. Things were not fine yesterday. They were as far from fine as they could be. She wasn’t behaving normally, her thoughts were too loud, too cheerful, irrational. Her smile was overly large, eyes unfocused. She wasn’t seeing things clearly._ _

__“I just can’t seem to walk straight, it’s bizzare really. The house you have here, it’s truly marvelous. Oh and the view! It must have cost you a fortune!” She was babbling, arms pointing in all directions._ _

__Charles was concerned, the woman’s behavior seemed out of place, she was frantic, her movements and words over pronounced. She didn’t seem to be in pain, nor did she seem to have any recollection of the past events. He looked her up and down, puzzled. Her appearance left much to be desired, yet she didn’t seem bothered by it. Her face was glowing, matching the levels of energy she exuded. It hit him as she looked around the room for the nth time in the last couple of minutes.  
She shut herself out. She closed off her memories. That's how her brain decided to cope with them. He was going to have to bring them back to her. It was the minds self defense mechanism, blocking out the most unpleasant memories in order to avoid the most intense trauma. He would have to access her mind, unlock the memories that her brain locked up deep inside it somewhere. This day was going to be horrible for her, he had to tell Raven about the situation. He decided to change the topic of conversation._ _

__“I’ll make you breakfast,” he spoke, bringing her attention back to him, “do some pancakes with fresh fruits sound nice?”_ _

__Her smile spread even wider, he felt deeply unsettled._ _

__“That’d be marvelous. I was just thinking that!” The woman was amazed._ _

__Yes, in fact, I knew. He added in his mind. She shut off more than he thought she did, she didn't even know he was a telepath. If he was going to do what had to be done, he didn't want to think of the consequences._ _

__“Sit tight, I’ll be back in a few.”_ _

__He had a situation on his hands. He was going to have to intrude into her conscience and bring those memories back. She would hate him for it. He needed to talk to someone. He was about to ruin that woman’s life and he wasn’t prepared to make that choice himself._ _

__Busying himself with making pancakes, he was momentarily distracted from his thoughts. He began mixing the batter, heating up the pan and waiting for the butter to liquify. He placed the first spoon of batter on the pan, instantly, as if drawn in by the smell of her favorite breakfast, Raven walked in sleepily. She sat down in front of Charles and slugishly grabbed at the plate._ _

__“Not for you I’m afraid, Sorry, maybe if there’s some batter left over,” Charles teased._ _

__“Who are they for, we both know I’m the only one in this house that enjoys pancakes.” She questioned, her voice was deep and raspy, she was still half asleep._ _

__“Now you aren’t the only one." He paused, "Alice” he laughed as Raven yawned, covering her mouth with her hand drowsily. She rolled her head back, taking in as much air as possible._ _

__“Ohh right... Yeah, yesterday you cuddled with her and now you’re making her pancakes, is there anything I missed?” She asked, mockingly._ _

__He mimicked her tone. “I could be asking the same thing about you and Hank yesterday.”_ _

__She blushed. “None of your business.”_ _

__That part of the conversation was over. He knew to let the matter rest, he was on reasonably good terms with her now. It would be a shame to spoil it, besides Alice would need a female friend._ _

__“I’m making her **pancakes** because she told me it’s what she craves. **I’m** making the pancakes because she isn’t strong enough to support her body,” he looked up at Raven, “she’s really weak. There’s also another problem that I was hoping to talk to you about.” _ _

__Raven nodded, taken aback by how the situation evolved. She didn’t think the woman would be that weak. She hoped that Alice would be on her feet soon, sometimes she missed being able to talk to a girl. What she heard next made her realize that her wish may not come true that easily. She was aware that the healing process, the fading and coming back would have destroyed the woman, although she failed to register that as part of her reality now._ _

__“She’s delusional. She blocked away the memories of the past few days. She has no recollection of what happened. I didn’t venture into her mind because she wasn’t in a state that would allow me to do so. I don’t even think she is aware about my power.”_ _

__“That’s,” She paused, “concerning.”_ _

__She seemed to be collecting her thoughts, eyes fixed on the browning treats Charles was making before her. She resumed her thoughts._ _

__“Yesterday it seemed more like she was in intense shock. Like really intense. It would make sense that she blocked the memories away. I remember her screams, and she wasn’t even in her physical state. Worse, I wasn’t feeling the pain yet the screams themselves made me collapse. You pulled her through hell, I heard her beg you to stop.” She was looking out the window, just saying what was on her mind. She learnt to be comfortable with Charles, so she didn't block much of what she said when talking to him. In this case however, it would have been wise of her to stop before voicing the last sentence._ _

__She hadn’t meant to say that last part out loud. Immediately, Charles’ expression shifted, his stare was blank, yet she knew she hit too close to home._ _

__“I. I’m sor-” she immediatley tried to apologise, yet she was cut off._ _

__“Don’t” he interrupted, voice cold, staring at the floor. “I felt it too. When I was in her mind, I felt it too.” He was shaking, voice uneven._ _

__“It’s-“ she tried again._ _

__“Stop. I had to do it. She was willing to die to heal me. She think she’s worthless, so she saved me. If I didn’t bring her back I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself. She was telling me to stop. I couldn’t, I felt it too you know?” He didn't want to have to explain himself, yet Raven made him feel like he had to._ _

__The pancake was burning, tears were in his eyes, threatening to fall. She moved to touch his hand gently. He jumped back. She was speaking tenderly, she had to bring him back._ _

__“It....” then a pause, she had to think of the correct thing to say, “I’m sure it wasn’t easy. For either of you. I don’t think my words through. It’s not what I meant.” She was trying to back track, going in circles. Words saving nothing._ _

__He looked down at the pancake, mainly because of the strong burning smell it emitted. He flipped it quickly, assessing the damage. The side was brown, fading into black. It would taste salty when eaten, that specific flavour that all burnt things came with. He was deciding for a while before he pulled the trash can open and flipped the burnt batter aside._ _

__By the time he made enough pancakes to fill the plate, judging by her state that Alice would be starving, not another word had passed between them. There were three pancakes left, so he opened a draw, pulled out a jar of Nutella and placed two of the pancakes on a plate for Raven._ _

__“Peace pancakes,” he declared, pushing the plate towards her._ _

__She accepted with a smile, looking up at him and nodding. She didn't have to be told twice, smearing nutella on them before literally throwing them into her mouth. Heavenly. Charles always made the best pancakes; even the maids, which cooked incredibly, couldn't out-do Charles' pancakes._ _

__He reached for the berries and proceeded to throw generous amounts of raspberries, strawberries and blueberries at the heap of pancakes. He wasn’t so sure now, as he looked at his creation, that Alice would finish them. It truly was a stack. He was about to leave the kitchen before Raven was calling his name. He looked back, the plate of pancakes still in his hands._ _

__Raven noticed he looked adorable, in his light blue sweater and white formal shirt. His eyes were wide in surprise, a smile plastered on his face. She doubted it was due to the pancakes. He was clutching the plate close to his chest, like a child clinging onto his new toy._ _

__She ran up to him holding a fork and a knife. “You forgot the utensils, here, let me walk with you.”_ _

__He nodded with gratitude. Raven wasted no time getting to the point._ _

__“Seeing as you told me she isn’t strong enough to walk, and we probably have to do something about that situation, you might want to ask Moria to provide us with a wheelchair.”_ _

__“Already done, I asked her yesterday evening after I went to my room.” He explained, it was easy to find her, it always had been. She wasn’t a mutant after all, humans couldn’t block his powers easily._ _

He recalled the conversation, it was the first time they talked since coming back from Cuba.  
—————————-  
_“Moria.”_

_“Charles, are you alright?”_

_“Yeah, we’re ok. How are you?”_

_“I’m good.”_

The conversation was awkward, she still couldn’t believe what she did at the beach. 

_"Speaking of,”_ he read her mind, _“I have a favour to ask of you, it shouldn’t be a big issue.”_

_“Anything, Charles”_

_“I need a wheelchair, the best you can afford”_

He felt her anxiousness skyrocket. 

_“Wait but you. I saw you walk. You were walking towards us. Oh god I’m so sorry Charles, I didn’t mean to, I didn’t know-“_

_“It’s not for me. It’s for Alice”_

When he received no confirmation that she understood what he meant, he tried again. 

_“Alice, the girl that saved my legs, the one who healed me. She’a too weak to walk, to support herself, to do anything really. So we need a wheelchair for her.”_

_Oh god, he thought. This happened becuase she sacrificed herself to save him. He should be in that wheelchair. He had to thank her, and truly appreciate his legs._

__

_“Yeah, we can do that. I’ll try to get one to you via helicopter tomorrow morning. You might need some clothes for her too.”_

_“Ahh yes, speaking of things we need, can we get a restock on Hanks’s supplies? I’m talking syringes, test tubes, vials. Anything you can get me would be good”_

_“Ok, goodnight Charles”_

_“Goodnight”_

__———-_ _

__“That’s nice, but there’s something else bothering you, I see it” She accused him._ _

__He didn’t reply for a while, they stopped before her room, they were speaking in hushed voices. He preferred not not speaking through their minds, seeing as he was still recovering from the battle that took their toll on everyone’s powers._ _

__“Well yes, she’s unaware of what happened at the beach as far as I’m aware. I don’t know how far her memory is affected. I didn’t look into it. She’s not really acting right. She’s delusional, hyperactive, too positive. It’s like her brain shut that whole pain away; it established a coping mechanism. It’s a strong coping mechanism, but her pain was insurmountable, it only makes sense.”_ _

__She knew what he was going to ask her about before he said it._ _

__“You’re going to bring those memories back aren’t you? You’re going to force her out” she asked in disbelief._ _

__He gave a short nod, lifting his head and looking at her._ _

__“There’s no other way. I’ll try to do it delicately, maybe I’ll make her remember harmless fragments and let her brain do the rest.”_ _

__They both seemed hesitant, however they were aware that the woman wouldn’t want to be kept in the dark, so to speak, for any longer than necessary. Something told him she was fierce at heart, no one he knew would have done what she did for him. Searching his brain, he truly couldn’t find anyone who he believed to sacrifice himself for him in the way he did. He was decided, it was for her best._ _

__They knocked on her door._ _

__“Come in!” Immediately, her eyes darted to the pancakes and she followed them until Charles set them down on the bed before her._ _

__“Oh these are delicious,” she mumbled between fork-fulls of pancakes._ _

__The pair sitting on the mahogany chairs exchanged a quick glance. It was all the confirmation they needed. Charles began once the plate was cleaned and the woman was staring at them expectedly._ _

__“I’m glad you enjoyed the pancakes,” he started on a lighter note before proceeding to the elephant in the room, “do you know how you got here?”_ _

__This earned him a blank stare, he decided to continue. This was what he expected._ _

__“What do you remember? Anything from two days ago?”_ _

__The girl took her time to gather her thoughts, they waited in silence. She was lost in her own thoughts, yet they wouldn’t rush her, any information she could give them regarding her state would help them decide on how to proceed. He had to try to bring her barrier down with minimal intervention._ _

__“A submarine, I think? I think my team was on a submarine? It was all very white. I didn’t really like it, too much white,” then she laughed, “I don’t think I’m making sense, that’s impossible.”She stopped abruptly._ _

__“What doesn’t make sense?” Charles guided._ _

__“I recall the submarine floating? Like flying. It was very loud, the lights went off and then it was shaking and we were in the air. I’m not making any sense that’s impossible.” She wasn’t looking at them, so she wasn’t able to see the smile that passed between them. She continued._ _

__“Then I remember pain, I couldn’t walk. I think I sat down? On a rock, I sat down on a rock. Yes. It hurt so much. But then you know..”_ _

__“You healed yourself” Charles chimed in after the girl fell silent._ _

__“Precisely, wait how did you know?” She questioned, tilting her head to the side, “I didn’t tell you that.”_ _

__“Do you remember anything else?” He purposely omitted her question._ _

__“No not really, why?” her tone had changed, they knew more about her than she told them. Suddenly she felt very unsafe. She didn't know where she was, who these people were and how she got here. Her mind also wasn't making sense. There were bits and pieces floating around her head, all wildly bizzare images. She couldn't comprehend them, for when she focused on one image, it seemed to float away into the haze, and she lost it._ _

__“It’s difficult to explain but maybe I can help you remember.” the man spoke again._ _

__“Meaning?” She questioned. This was all very odd._ _

__The man wasn’t making sense to her, actually nothing was making sense to her. These people, the room. She had an odd feeling that they knew more about her than she knew about them. The man puzzled her especially. She had a vague remembrance of his face, yet nothing she could pin point. It was like walking past a stranger on the street and having to look back because they looked familiar. He looked familiar._ _

__She noticed his hand move up to his temple and then suddenly, for she couldn’t explain how, all her attention was focused on his eyes. Her mind flooded with images, it was as if a damn had been opened and without warning, she was drowning. Drowning in experiences. Her body was filled with feelings, overcome with sensations. She lost sight of the room, her mind turned black. She had no idea where she was until a vision formed before her eyes. The eyes were back, she remembered seeing them on the beach, when she was healing herself. How did she know she was heaing herself? She both knew and didn't know, struggling against her own memories. They were winning. She remembered the beach, she remembered the sky, thinking how odd it was that it was clear._ _

__He was guiding her through it all, suppressing her intense reactions where need be. She was looking at Shaw’s body, surprisingly, Charles didn’t have to control her reactions for they weren’t strong. Mere acceptance, yet in his haze, did he detect relief too? It was too brief to pinpoint, he had to carry her through. He couldn't spend too long on a particular memory, or else she would break through._ _

__She was moving to her friends, recalling the missiles, he kept only a loose track of her mind now. The story was telling itself, all he had to do was guide her through it and manœuvre her emotions accordingly. They were looking at the missiles now, Charles felt her fear building slowly as her realization kicked in. His powers weren’t storing enough to tell whether this awakening happened in the presence or past, whatever the case, he couldn’t stop now. Couldn’t let her deal with what was about to happen to her alone._ _

__Then he heard it, the bullet fired and he braved himself to help her through again. What he expected through was shock. What he received was soul crunching grief, the woman was devastated, overcome by emotions. He felt his stomach plummet. Was it his own? Or hers? Or in her memories? Yet he believed it was his own, right now in the present, for he knew what was comimg his way, and there was no way to stop it. Even though he wouldn't feel the pain, he still tensed in his chair. A hasty breath was drawn in by the woman on the bed, tears fell from her eyes. The barrier was broken, she knew what was about to happen._ _

__Raven was speaking._ _

__“Charles? Charles what happened?” there was an urgency in her tone. He didn't know whether it was due to him tensing up, or the breath Alice took in._ _

__He couldn’t reply, too much focus was being taken by the action at hand. It was becoming harder for him to navigate her. She was running to his body now, elbowing his friends as he felt his own presence in her mind. What a weird sensation it was, he thought, having experienced it for the first time in his life._ _

__“Charles stop, she’s glowing” Raven cautioned._ _

__That’s why it was harder for him to guide her through it. She was aware of what was happening. Her subconsciousness was, at least. He was debating what to do, he could either force her through it, which would allow him to suppress her emotions and make the experience less painful for her, simultaneously making sure that she was aware of what happened. He considered it, her resistance was getting stronger the closer he got to the moment she disintegrated. He could, just withdraw from her mind now. It would mean that she would have to go through the pain again, and he wasn’t keen on that happening.  
He was still deciding what to do, delaying the onset of the pain by making her focus on foolish details. Her mind seemed to wonder to him the most, so he let her eyes wonder across his face. They were moving slowly, and he observed through her eyes where her gaze lingered. Eyes, brows, mouth. _ _

__He felt a blush creeping up on his cheeks._ _

_“Stop”_ she was inside his head. He could have imagined it. He delayed the process further. She was still looking at him. He felt her feelings then, even through he tried to avoid them. He couldn't believe what he felt. There was no time to discover them further, for he heard a voice in his head. 

_“Stop, Charles. I remember. Don’t make me go through it again.”_ Still in his mind. He was hesitant, he had to make sure she was physically decided. 

__They heard it then, Raven jumping at the unexpected noise in the room._ _

__“Please. I know.” It was a weak voice, choked out with much willpower._ _

__He withdrew immediately, he could almost feel a light tingling where the bullet had struck him; he had truly immersed himself in her memories. Oh how lucky he was that she had been there and willing to help._ _

__Raven was by Alice’s side, holding her hand in hers. The gesture was meant to calm the distraught woman. Her eyes only shot daggers at Charles._ _

__“Why did you go so far? Better yet, how dare you look into my mind? We aren’t on the field anymore.” Her voice was paralyzing, her tears gone. She was intimidating even when seconds ago she was in such a vulnerable position._ _

__“I saved you because I thought you had morals. Apparently, I was mistaken.” The woman was spitting venom at him. “You were ready to make me re-live that, even after you FELT how much pain it caused me.”_ _

__He had to interrupt her, or else he wouldn’t be able to explain himself._ _

__“I had to do that. You weren’t in your right mind yesterday. You didn’t see how you were acting. Delusional for God’s sake.”_ _

__His voice came out harsher than necessary, the woman wasn’t having it, she was about to speak again, yet Raven was faster._ _

__“We’re sorry to have caused you pain. We didn’t mean to put you to harm. It’s just yesterday and today morning, it was clear that you didn’t remember what happened.” Her voice was gentle, trying to soothe her._ _

__“When I went to check on you today morning, you were too happy. I could see that you weren’t alright even though you truly wanted to be. I’m sorry I didn’t leave your mind earlier. I’m also promising you that I will not read your mind purposely unless you give me the permission to do so. This was simply a critical situation.” His voice was calmer now, yet he was still tense._ _

__“I know you felt me resist. You didn’t stop. YOU DIDN’T GIVE A FUCK. I couldn’t fight it, you were pushing me through something that you KNEW I feared and couldn’t resist.” Alice shouted at him. She didn't care about being kind. He overstepped his line._ _

__She withdrew her hand from Raven's grasp. She didn't want to be near these two people._ _

__“I thought that I was doing something good. Now LOOK at me,” and gestured to her body, “I can’t even walk so you think the best thing to do is remind me of the agony I felt? You heard me. I wanted to DIE,” she was fuming, screaming at him, “I never wanted to feel ANYTHING again.”_ _

__A shudder shook her as she recalled the events of the previous nights. She never should have intervened. She should have been selfish, let him suffer. She had placed others before her too many times in her life. This was the end of it. She thought these people were good, yet now all she did was despise them. Oh how wrong she had been. She thought she was safe from Shaw, yet now she was afraid again. This was just how her life had always been, being betrayed and decieved by those she trusted. She woved to leave them as soon as possible._ _

__“Leave. Now.” She spoke sternly. The intruders were too stunned to speak. They didn't move, didn't think she was serious._ _

__“Get. Out” she spat. She didn’t care how rude she seemed, she had to be alone. Completely alone, she thought and added, voice scalding._ _

__“And don’t you DARE look into my mind again.” She was looking directly at Charles. Oh, she wasn’t going to forgive him anytime soon._ _

__He didn’t trust his voice so he only nodded, looking back at her. He couldn’t even hold her gaze. His posture was limp, arms hunched at his sides.  
The two of them, walking into her room what seemed like hours ago as saviors, escaped the room as those who betrayed her._ _


	5. Chess and Conversation

_“Chess, eighteen o’clock.”_

It was the fastest way to get Erik to talk to him. They always settled their disputes during a game of chess. Charles always won, although the act of playing was merely a distraction, acting as a for time to contemplate their arguments. He wasn’t expecting a reply, the two hadn’t spoken a word since the time Erik supported him in the kitchen. He knew he would turn up, it was an unspoken agreement.

Charles still had to make his mind up as to how to approach the matter. He had to sort his own feelings out before talking to Erik; it would otherwise end up becoming a disaster. He could simply wait for Erik to speak, yet he knew this wasn’t going to happen. Erik wasn’t one to voice his emotions freely.

He would have to extract the words from him in a way, treading on a fine line between accusing him for their situation but allowing him to realize this by himself. He sighed, he wanted to sort things out, get things straight between them. He was sick of it, the situation between them was so bloody awkward. They avoided looking at each other when they walked past each other in the hallways. When Charles entered a room, Erik immediately found an excuse to leave it; Charles was convinced Erik was avoiding him.

He was starting to get annoyed. Yes, he wasn’t over what had happened at the beach, Erik stepped out too far. Charles could have predicted it, he could have known. After all, they did disagree on crucial matters. However he didn’t know that Erik would be so careless in his will for destruction, almost impulsive in his actions. How naïve it was of him to think that it would suffice for Erik to kill Shaw. He should have known it. In fact, he knew it as soon as he lost contact with him on that vessel, when he stepped into the void. He lost him there. 

Now, they had another problem on their hands, and they had to be united to solve it. There was no chance of moving forward if they were hung up on old grudges. That being said, Charles had no intention of standing down, he was waiting for an apology. An apology to the team, not to him, for his legs had little to do compared to the trust that was now broken within them. By redirecting those missiles at the innocent men in those ships, Erik had violated what they agreed on prior to the attack; they weren’t going to harm any humans if they could help it. This agreement, although created partially due to the fact that Charles truly didn’t want to harm innocent people, was created so that society wouldn’t despise them more than they already did. 

Their involvement in that crisis was necessary purely out of the fact that Shaw and his team were also mutants, and it was only logical to fight fire with fire. His team was meant to battle the mutants only, harming as few civilians as possible. Erik’s deed, whether done in a burst of rage or meticulously planned beforehand, placed all of them at risk. This wasn’t what they agreed on, this wasn’t low profile anonymity. This was logic surpassing rage driven by intense emotion, he understood, yet the act itself could not be overlooked. They had to talk.

He sat down in his study, piles of papers were thrown all over the desk, spilling to the floor, the carpet was barley visible. He didn’t mind it, not really. His room was always like this, it was the only way he could think, the only way he could find all the necessary paperwork whiteout having to look through a dozen drawers. He sat down at his desk and pushed the papers aside, he hadn’t touched the room since they left for Cuba, yet now he had more reports to look through. Opening the parcel that he received from the CIA, he buried himself in the paperwork, completely forgetting the passage of time.

——————————————————————-

The sound of the clock broke his focus. Five o’clock. He rose from his chair, body stiff from the prolonged stillness, mind at rest, relaxed. He had completed all the necessary reports but one. It could wait. He shook his arms and legs out, what a relief to be standing. 

What a privilege. Something in his mind told him. His good mood immediately faded. He still hadn’t talked to her about it, hadn’t properly thanked her. He looked up at the mahogany clock in the corner of the roof. An hour till his game with Erik. There wasn’t any point in continuing his paperwork, there wasn’t enough time; although there was plenty of time to do something he didn’t do often. Clean up the mess. It was a monotonous task, yet rewarding. His hands mindlessly sorting through the heaps of papers. He got to his knees, starting at the floor. At least he wouldn’t step on them later. He didn’t notice the time passing, but when the clock rang once more, he had just finished with the floor. The rest would have to wait for later.

He left the room and headed for the library. The door was ajar, Erik was waiting, hands before his chin, fingertips touching. The board was set up before him. White for him; black for Erik. They always played like so, although he never knew when it stuck. They didn’t say a word when Charles sat down, barley acknowledging each other’s presence. Charles took the first move. He knew he would have to wait for Erik to open up. He didn’t push it. 

“I assume you didn’t just miss playing,” Erik began, “you wanted to talk.” He made his move, never looking up from the board.

Charles was looking at Erik though, not at the game. 

“Indeed,” he hummed, “I thought we ought to talk”

He glanced down, moving his piece forward. There was only one question to ask.

“Why?” 

Erik contemplated, moving one of his own pieces forward. He didn’t reply.  
Charles made his move, yet never really let go of his piece, making it hover millimeters above the board. He was looking at the man again, he could play this game too. He wasn’t going to finish the move until he spoke.

“Because he killed my mother,” his voice was devoid of emotion. 

Charles placed the piece down.

“The missiles” his voice was stern, unforgiving. He knew exactly what he meant, they were playing the game. The temperature of the room was elevated, and it wasn’t due to the fireplace. The last time it was this tense between them was the last time they played. Nobody was going to give in easily.

Erik made his move. Charles leaned back in the chair, his face showed no anger, only disappointed expectancy. The fire was crackling, Charles could wait. He was studying the board, assessing the possible moves and predicting Erik’s ones. He was disturbed from his thoughts by the sound of speech.

“If I didn’t stop them, they would have killed us,” his voice was matter of fact, a hint of pride in it.

“That’s not what I meant,” Charles retorted, “you wanted to fire them back at the humans.”

“They wanted to kill us Charles. I saved us. I treated them like they treated us. Fire with fire.”

He couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“We agreed to anonymity. Low profile. Not harming humans if necessary. Firing their own missiles at them isn’t the way to do things.” Charles was lecturing, his voice conveying his disbelief and outrage. 

“It was either us or them.” Erik was convinced, he truly belived in what he was saying.

“No,” Charles stopped him. “You could have dropped these missiles into the sea at the flick of your hand. It was your choice to attack those men. They didn’t know what they were fighting against. We’re the ones capable of changing society. We’re the ones capable of changing people’s opinions. You said it yourself, we’re the better men.”

“You still don’t see that they will take every chance to kill us?” Erik was disbelieving, proving his point.

Charles made his move. They had long forgotten the game. It had served its purpose. Ignited the conversation. Both men were leaning forward now, barley breaking eye contact.

“They don’t know what we are. They fear the unknown my friend, and I assure you that what you tried to do doesn’t help us in the slightest.” Charles was bothered, he wasn’t hiding it anymore. His voice was just above a whisper. Erik was wrong.

Erik was silent. This was Charles’ chance.

“Fear transforms into anger, my friend. The more they fear us, the more they despise us. And they do fear us, for being different. They can’t control us. They feel vulnerable. We have to show them we don’t mean harm. That our purpose isn’t to eliminate them.” He was reasoning. 

Erik made his move, he was losing. There was a long break. None of them said anything. This was a game far beyond the physical. This was deeper, rooting back to the source of all their disputes.

“I understand your pain,” Charles paused, what he said now would, and how the man opposite him reacted, would determine the outcome of this situation. “But killing people now won’t bring back your mother. Those aren’t the people who harmed her. The man that is responsible is dead. Those people caused her no suffering.” His voice was soft, he didn’t want to upset his friend but he had to prove his point.

He waited as Erik considered. None of them moved an inch. The man broke Charles’ gaze and looked down to his legs. 

“I’m sorry about your legs, I didn’t mean to hurt you.” His voice was earnest. 

Charles nodded, he was waiting for more though. They would talk about that matter some other time. The bullet was an accident. A consequence of Erik’s actions. He had to make him realize that.

“It wouldn’t have happened if you let them go. You know this Erik, let us move past this for everyone’s sake.” His temper was running short. 

It was true, everyone was walking on eggshells. Both due to their evident discomfort towards each other as well as the new girl’s arrival. 

“I was driven by rage. Fueled by adrenaline,” he was explaining. Charles gave him a disapproving look. “It doesn’t explain it, I’m aware but understand me. You won’t be able to, but give it a try.”

A hint of jealousy crossed his features. This was always a delicate topic between them. 

“I was treated like the scum of the earth for my entire life. Beaten, tortured, abused, thrown out by humans. I didn’t live a picture perfect life. Far from it. I had to hide, run and escape for my entire existence. I didn’t get to live in the upper class, in a mansion, with people who cared for me.” His voice was cold, yet unstable. 

“You don’t live that way now, you’re with us. Safe, respected. We’re equals Erik. Look around you. You have a safe home, friends, people who care for you. Things have changed.” He was speaking as he would address a child, guiding him to realization.

“Then why are we still treated like dirt. Why are we hiding?” 

“Because society isn’t ready to accept us. They don’t know anything about us, only that we’re capable of harm. And that’s only due to Cuba. Society fears the unknown, there’s noting we can do to change that. What we can do is stay low profile until it settles out there, find peace amongst ourselves, rest; emerge when the time is right and show that we’re not much different than them in terms of ideals. Show them we don’t mean harm. That’s our future.” He was so close, so close to reaching an understanding between them. 

He had one more thing left to say;

“But that won’t happen if we don’t agree amongst ourselves; it won’t happen if we won’t find peace amongst our team. We have to put our difference aside, find common ground.”

Erik nodded, it was faint, but Charles knew Erik understood. It was, currently, all he could ask for. He knew the apology would take time.

Charles glanced downwards, the game was a tie. He wasn’t focusing on it, of course it had been a tie. He took a mental note to actually try and win the games now. Erik broke the silence.

“How are your legs?” He questioned, tone friendly. 

They were going to continue as friends now. That was evident, they would come back to this another time, Charles would make sure they would.

“I can feel them,” he laughed, “which I guess is all I could ask for.”

Erik smiled.

“I didn’t mean to, it just happened. I didn’t know-“ he was apologizing.

“Just do try to make sure it doesn’t happen again. I’m sure glad she was there to help.” Charles responded. The response was stated in a humored tone, yet there was an underlying seriousness behind it. “I’m glad it’s not me needing the wheelchair.”

Eric was alarmed. He was quick to ask, face immediately riddled in concern. Of course, no one but Raven and Charles knew what was truly happening to Alice. It's not like they could, she hadn't even left her room. He didn’t mean to let that slip.

“What do you mean? She isn’t alright?”

Charles shook his head. No. He felt a deep sorrow, he couldn’t quite explain it. A sudden sadness overwhelmed him.

“Charles, tell me.” He commanded. There was a hint of fear in his voice. Why on earth did Erik seem so interested all of a sudden?

His throat clenched. He couldn’t utter a word. His words came out croaky, unsure, hurt. He knew it was his fault.

“She’s too weak to walk. She can’t stand on her own. It’s because of what happened when healing me. She can’t seem to recover.”

Eri k was on his feet in an instant. Charles immediately did the same. Eric expression changed, he was hit with realization.

“Why haven’t I seen her since the beach? Why hasn’t she left her room? What did you do to her?” He was fuming. The chess pieces began to shake, a cacophony of noises. Charles felt a feeling grow inside his chest. There was no time to think about it. If he didn’t react he was going to get punched.

“She was sleeping, then she woke up and she couldn’t walk. She was distressed, then she fell asleep again and I haven’t been to see her since.” He tried to explain as calmly as he could, but he was hissing the words out. Telling Erik to back off.

“There’s more isn’t there?” His voice was accusatory. “You did something to her, I saw you leave her room!”  
The furniture was shaking, powered by the screws inside it.

Charles said the words before he could think about them.

“She was delusional so ImadeherrememberCuba and nowshehatesme.” He blurted out.

“You what?” Erik didn’t think he heard right. He what? He didn’t believe it. Charles took advantage of her.

Charles steadied himself, there was no avoiding it.

“I went to check in on her, she had no recollection of the past events, so I made her remember what happened and I may have pushed too far and now she hates me.”

Erik was too stunned to speak.

“You forced yourself into her mind when she was vulnerable, DEFENSELESS?” He couldn’t believe it. “What on earth were you thinking? You must have traumatized her. How could you take advantage of her in such ways? Didn’t you get enough of showing off your powers in Cuba? It simply wasn’t enough for you? Of course it wasn’t. You’re the GREAT Charles Xavier. Savior to mankind, you just HAD to make her remember begging for death!” Erik was roaring, the furniture was flying around the room. Erik went too far, he crossed a fine line.

“You don’t understand-“ Charles grabbed him by the shoulder, attempting to stop him. He wasn’t going to be stopped. 

“No. Apparently you don’t understand how the human mind works.”

And with that, the man stormed out of the room,slamming the door. The paintings on the walls shook. Charles fell into his chair. 

Why did Erik care so much? And why did that bother him? He thought, for he identified the feeling he felt before. 

_Jealousy._


	6. The Wheelchair

She sat on her bed. Her head was filled to the brim with thoughts. She knew she had to steady herself. She sat cross legged on her bed, placed her palms on her knees and breathed in.She was immediately surrounded by sand, it was all she could see. No other sensations reached her. She was looking around, trying to identify her surroundings. She could make out the faint murmurs of the sea, the rhythms of its waves, crashing against the shore. She took a few more breaths, savoring the moment. It was heavenly peace after the turmoil she experienced.

She tried to bring her heart rate down, she was still in shock after what had just happened. How dare he do something so brutal? There was a reason as to why she had repressed them. And he dared to think it was acceptable to venture into her mind when she was defenseless. 

The blonde’s breath sped up again. Adrenaline flowing through her veins as the memories harassed her again. This time it wasn’t even a full memory, all she recalled was the agony. She was hyperventilating. Her breaths short and shallow. 

People always say that the body doesn’t remember pain. She begged to differ as her body was engulfed by that monster. He was clutching her body as he dragged her down into the abyss of hell. Everywhere his claws lingered, her body burned. She was trying to crawl back up, arms and legs flailing as she tried to resist. He was ripping her legs apart, she was screaming, screaming so loud her throat turned sore. The pain wasn’t ending, she was gripping onto the bed frame. It should have been gone by now, it never lasted this long. Whatever this man did to her, and she knew all to well what he did, the monster consuming her now was his creation.

Tears were flowing freely from her eyes. She knew this wasn’t real but the pain wouldn’t subside. All she could do was wait until sleep overtook her. After what seemed like hours of thrashing, the creature of her imagination gnawing at her legs, ripping them to pieces, she fell into a dream of nightmares.

Her sheets were soaked in sweat when she woke up. She still hadn’t changed. The whole day was a blur, she didn’t know what happened. All she recalled were the nightmares, waking up in her own sweat and tears; then fearing sleep yet succumbing to it when her memories got the best of her. It was an endless cycle of pain, just like her life had been.

She wasn’t dreaming about the day on the beach, she could deal with that. She was dreaming about the countless other times she wished she died at the hands of Shaw’s men. About excruciating pain, about a woman with blonde hair that made her skin crawl even now. What she would give to forget these memories. It was true that for a while she had, it was her only means of survival, to repress the thoughts and force then down so deep into her consciousness that she ceased to remember them. It was her daily cycle of survival. Their torture was endless.

When her shields surrounded the innocent humans. When she wasn’t able to heal Shaw’s men. When she was so weak that she wasn’t able to focus for long enough to help them. When she slipped up and her field was to weak. When after hours of torment by Emma, she wasn’t able to protect her dignity, when her most private memories were used against her. They would bring her to the brink of death with every mistake she made. They never let her train, never let her improve, it brought them joy to torture her, use her as a training bag and then harm her when she couldn’t protect herself. 

She had tried to run away many times, being too desperate to care for the consequences. She didn’t want to remember, so she put up her shield and tried to lift herself off the bed. She groaned in disgust as the mattress made a squishy sound, sweat clinging onto her hands. 

Alice wanted to see what time it was, the clock in her room signified it was already another day. A day of nightmares, nobody came to check on her. Nobody came to wake her. 

Alice knew she had to get up,had to start living again. It wasn’t that easy though. The wheelchair was too far for her to reach, and she didn’t trust herself to walk yet. She had to call for help, but who?

Not Charles. He was about the last person on earth she wanted to see right now. The plan was to avoid him as much as possible. He was out of the question. 

Raven was the same. Not an option. A shame really, she thought she could like the girl, there was something in her that made her few they could be good friends. That would have to wait though. The situation had to be sorted out first. Yes, that’s what she had to get to first. It would be safe for her to have everyone on her side, especially since she was still weak.

She sighed, she didn’t like the idea of having to forgive the pair for what they did, but she would have to try and act friendly. Put on an act for her own good. Knowing nothing about these people, she wasn’t even sure she was safe. Although the fact that she wasn’t dead probably implied that. Still, they could be keeping her to find out more about Shaw. Now that the idea occurred in her head she was even more wary of the telepath. She got herself into deep shit, taking into consideration that no matter how much she knew she had to hate him, she couldn’t. 

Before she could figure out a plan of action, there was a knock on the door. She moved back into the corner of the bed, moving her knees up before her chest. It had happened instinctively, probably due to the thoughts that just occurred in her head.

“Come in!” She squeaked, surprising herself. After all, she hadn’t spoken much over the few days.

The door opened slowly. She saw a plate, on it a sandwich and a glass of juice. The plate was followed by a man. He was wearing a black turtleneck and khaki pants. His hair was sleeked back, accentuating his features. She allowed herself a quick glance up and down his body. She could see he was well built, then she almost recoiled in her bed. This was the man who caused all of this to happen. Erik.

“I have some food, I figured you may be hungry.” He suggested, placing the plate on the bedside table besides her.

The woman wasn’t sure what to say. It would be acceptable to feel disgust towards him, it would be acceptable to scream and shout at him, yet appearntly, her brain had other plans.

“Why are you here? I thought you would have left after what happened.” Was the first thing that came to her mind. 

She didn’t really know what to think of the man, he had saved them from the missiles, but he had also tried to kill all those men. Most importantly, he was most responsible for what happened to Charles, and thus, to her. Yet she wanted to know what he had to say. He responded vaguely.

“It’s complicated,” he paused, “It’s always been. There’ll be a better time to explain it, besides, judging by how much time Charles spends with you, he may want to tell you yourself.”

She was biting into the sandwich, hunger getting the best of her. She couldn’t figure any of these people out. This guy spoke in riddles, Charles tried to help her by leaving her alone with her worst fears and apparently these two were still not okay. She desperately needed answers or some information as to what was happening. To get that, she had to leave the room for once. She ignored the lack of precise reply, for now she could use him to help her. She would figure out what’s actually happening and who to trust when she got out. 

“Fine, tell me later. For now, would you mind moving the wheelchair here so that I can walk?” She questioned.

His eyes went wide. He looked astounded. 

“Wait you seriously can’t walk? What happened?” There was anger in his voice, yet she knew it wasn’t directed at her.

She wasn’t doing this again, not today and not in a long time. They’d have to figure it out themselves. Or ask Charles. His eyes were still wide. She had to tell him something.

“Go ask Charles. He knows ALL about it,” the words came out harsher than she intended. She didn’t care. That git deserved it.

Erik looked around the room, “Where is it?” 

He was going to let the matter drop, seeing as she turned red and began glowing again. He doubted she was aware of it, yet he wasn’t risking anything. 

“I think they pushed it into the closet, but that’s my best guess. Last time I saw it it was next to that chair,” she pointed to one of the chairs in the far corner of the room, “so naturally, I couldn’t get there.”

He walked around the room, opening the closet. She sipped on her juice. Anything to distract herself from what was about to happen. Her athleticism was always her pride, she was always sporty, fit and strong; to not be able to walk felt....

Devastating. As he wheeled the chair over to her she suddenly had the overwhelming urge to sob. It filled her body like a wave, she couldn’t control it. There was no chance this was her life now. She simply wouldn’t accept it. 

She was sick to the stomach, feeling so sorry for herself. She never wanted to feel that way in her life yet here she was, overcome by so many emotions that she physically couldn’t keep them in. Her head was buzzing, spinning with realization. She just lost her independent ability to move around without assistance. Looking at the wheelchair in spite she heard the door slam opened and her stomach did a summersault. 

“What-“ 

Charles burst in through the door. He was panting, he looked as if he just ran a mile. In fact, he ran straight from his study to her room when he felt her. Her fear and disgust being so strong there was no way for him to not feel them himself. As soon as he did burst in, he was stunned, though not by Erik’s presence in the room. 

Then she thew up. 

He didn’t give Erik a second glance; quickly moving to her side and pushing her hair out of her face when she saw she tried and failed miserably to do so. Alice braced herself herself on the bed frame. She was breathing heavily. She was aware she looked and smelt like shit, yet that didn’t seem to stop Charles from moving closer to her. She didn’t have the strength to resist. Cheeks flaming in embarassment. Charles lifted himself from the bed.

She looked up to see him, hands on the wheelchair, positioning it in front of her. There was no point resisting, she had suffered enough shame. The man before her had other plans though.

“Wait,” he spoke, he moved towards her and lifted her up bridal style. Alice was momentarily stunned.

“There,” he placed her gently onto the wheelchair.

She was looking apologetically at the mess on the floor. Charles didn’t miss it.

“Don’t worry, I’ll ask one of the maids to get it.”

“I’m sorry, this is all moving very fast for me. There’s a lot going on.” She explained, apologizing. 

“It’s no problem. I should apologize too, I should have warned you for what I was going to do. I understand if you won’t forgive me,” he offered. 

She didn’t respond. What he just said didn't make fit the conversation. He said it because he had to. Or maybe becuase he wanted to get it out of the way? Alice had mixed emotions about this man. She wanted to forgive him, she could practically feel his kindness radiating off him, but she couldn’t do it. Her soul was telling her to forgive. Her mind was screaming at her for even letting him come near her. The rational thoughts inside her won the conflict. The damage had been done. Not just yet. She remained silent. He understood. 

Erik was still in the room, feeling out of place. How on earth had she just accepted what Charles did so easily? He felt he was interrupting something. She clearly responded better to Charles than she did to him, even though her words earlier contradicted that. Hell, now she was letting Charles scoop her into his arms, opening up to him. Erik didn’t understand. It was him who came here to comfort her, to offer his company and shoulder to cry on. Charles had visibly upset her, he wanted to help her. Instead all he did was.... 

Well he did nothing. Charles stormed in and literally swept her off her feet. His blood was boiling, Charles the angel, always saving the day. He felt movement all over the room and immediately tried to calm himself. Her wheelchair was shaking slightly. It was best to just leave. 

None of them noticed when he slipped out. He was so preoccupied with the situation that he bumped into someone on the way. She was holding a box, it was filled to the brim: clothes, towels, toiletries, books. Everything. It didn’t take him long to realize it was meant for Alice.

“Erik!” Raven laughed. “What’s got you so caught up in your head?” She teased. She did get very comfortable with him, after all he had helped her accept herself.

His tone was rough, the one he always assumed when complaining about Charles.

“Oh nothing,” he hoped she wouldn’t notice, “just Charles bursting in and saving the day again. Being a moral angel as usual.” He made sure to make his words sound innocent, and not reflective of his true emotions.

“Okay well, he asked me to bring this so I’ll just do that.” She was very cheerful, lost in her own world, oblivious to Erik’s anger. She moved past him into the door.

Erik was going to go for a run. It always helped clear his mind, and boy did his mind need clearing right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if this chapter was shorter and less detailed. Apparently my brain didn't feel like working much today. I promise that the next chapter will be much better. When I have time I'll come back to this one. Also, if you want to see some specific fluffy scenes with Charles, please do comment and I will try to integrate them into the story once it develops. 
> 
> I promise there is about to be some action.


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